Saturday, November 17, 2012

riddle me this...

what do the following items have in common?

a lamp shade
a 9 x 12 picture frame
a three strand beaded necklace and
a plastic christmas mixing bowl

if you guessed things-my-son-broke-this-week, then you're totally right.  yes, i'm being serious.

it's not that he's a holy terror (though sometimes yes, he can be).  it's just that he really, really, really wants to "HELP YOU, MOMMY!"   i am frightened at the thought of his assistance when the baby arrives.  i mean seriously, if i have to hear "UH OH, MOMMY, I BROKE IT" again ... for any reason... i swear, i am going to scream.

actually, no, i'm not.  you can't take it with you.  it is what it is.  one thing you can say about two-year-olds - they are FANTASTIC at teaching you to be less materialistic about... you know, anything.  i remember that when i was growing up, i often wondered why my mom didn't seem to care about her things.  i would closely guard my room from intruding younger siblings, i would insist that if my sister and i played with the ceramic teasets we both received from our aunt - we used hers (in case anything got broken) and i would meticulously inventory my book collection to make sure no one's grubby fingers had borrowed a treasure from my personal library.  all my mom could muster after yet another possession of hers was ruined by her brood?  an exasperated sigh or maybe a muttered "jesus, mary and joseph!" (my mom's choice "swear word") under her  breath.

i now understand that it wasn't that my mother didn't care about her china or her crystal or her new recliner or carpeting - it was just that she had resigned herself to the fact that her house wasn't hers (at least not for the immediate decade) and instead, it belonged to a ravenous pack of wolves hustling, bustling brood of six children for whom "oops, mom, i broke it!" was a regular, maybe even daily, utterance.  and so it is for me, too.  welcome to motherhood.

jack is a very contrite sinner.  yesterday after admiring a necklace i was wearing and then accidentally pulling it, resulting in beads EVERYWHERE, he promptly apologized and helped me and john pick up each one.  ("i sorry, mommy.  i sorry i break necklace.")  i couldn't even be mad.  at the end of a week where i've cried over too many ridiculous things (it's just that point in my pregnancy maybe?) and felt like i'm on the verge of an emotional breakdown for near on five days straight, i just couldn't even summon the strength for a "jesus, mary and joseph!" ala my mom.

anyway, the good news is that i feel NO compelling desire to purchase any expensive furniture or household decor for the next, you know, decade or so.  and THAT is a win.  or so says my husband.

other things two-year olds are good at?  helping you control pregnancy weight gain.  i had a craving for a vanilla milkshake this evening and we (jack and i) headed to the hardee's drive-through to satisfy it.  i had ONE sip of the thing, then jack decided "i try, too, mommy?"  the next thing i knew, he had devoured the entire thing, and i was just the fool holding the extra straw.  well, thanks for keeping me on the path away from gestational diabetes, my love.  i am thankful for your concern.

hope you all had a wonderful saturday - milkshakes or not.

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