on customer service.

ironically enough (you will see why below), one of my colleagues remarked yesterday that the service industry is dying.  that there just seems to be a complete and utter lack of initiative and motivation when it comes to good customer service on a day-to-day basis.  and because it had taken me near on 12 minutes to get a cup of chicken soup to go from the restaurant in my building that shall remain nameless, i agreed with his observation.

later that night, jack became obsessed with the idea of making cupcakes.  i decided to indulge him and, because we had to pick up part of his new bed that had been shipped to the store, we decided to make the trek to gather the necessary liners and sprinkles for our late night dessert.  we quickly decided on blue frosting with sprinkles at the store, grabbed dora stickers for the well-behaved wee one, and were on our way to the site-to-store pick-up area.

they bring out the box and ask if i need assistance getting it to my car.  which i do - and they summon a man who appears homeless and who's name i didn't catch.  he walks very slowly, as he pushes the large dolly with the box.  after what seems like an eternity, we arrive at the back of our car and he looks at me.  "i can't lift this myself," he says in an exasperated tone, as if i was supposed to assume that the person they sent to assist me with this task would be incompetent.  so, i maneuver my THIRD TRIMESTER belly and bend over to help this man with the box, and i swear to you - he has one hand limply on the thing, guiding it into my trunk, while i am lifting the entire thing myself.  we get it in the trunk and while it fits width-wise, it becomes clear that i need to put the seats down, which i cannot do since MY SON NEEDS TO SIT THERE.  mr. genius himself wonders if "the baby can sit on the floor" or "up in the front with ya'all."  (not exactly sure who he was referring to - unless THE CHILD IN UTERO and myself - who were the only passengers on this strange and awful journey)

"no," i say firmly, "my son cannot sit on the floor or in the front.  he needs to be in his carseat.  i think we'll have to take this back inside and i can come back tomorrow to pick it up."  the man snorts.  "my job was to take this out to your car, i don't bring it back inside."  i really thought he was joking because... that sort of statement defies logic, in my opinion.  i just stare at him.  "do you live close by here?" he inquires.  "because you can just drive slow on the highway and it shouldn't fall out the back if you're careful."  the trunk of my car would have to have been more than halfway open and frankly, i wasn't even going to consider any more of this man's bright ideas.  i look him level in the eye and ask him very directly, "are you really not going to help me bring this back into the store?  it won't fit in my car without the seats down and i can't put them all the way down because i have my son here."  the man shakes his head, "i'm sorry, i wish i could help, but i can't bring it back in.  it's not my job."

i squint my eyes at him.  i am trying to be as respectful as i can be.  "ok, thank you very much," i reply in my most non-sarcastic tone.  "i will take it from here."  i call john and ask him to meet me so he can drive jack back in our other car while i transport this box home.  MEANWHILE, the man just hovers around my car, mumbling and asking if i'm okay.  he also offers other suggestions, like that i should turn the heat up in my car because it's going to get cold since the trunk is hanging open.  thanks for your help, sir, but if you really wanted to help me, we'd have this box back in the store by now.  finally, i can take his "assistance" no longer, and i tell him that i've got it all under control and he can leave now.

i will be sharing this story at the office upon my arrival this morning to confirm yesterday's hypothesis that customer service is, in fact, dead.

oh and yes, this happened at wal-mart.  which i ordered from because they were selling the exact bed i wanted for $50 cheaper than other stores.  well, last night, it wasn't worth the $50 to me to freeze in my car while i waited for my husband... so you know, you live and learn.  SERIOUSLY.